Goodbye 2010

As this year comes to a close, and we take some time to reflect and look back, the overwhelming sentiment is gratitude.  It has not always been easy and joyful.  There were many trials- health struggles, failed relationships, pain, lost loved ones, failed marriages, sick babies, friends' cancer relapses, and too many children's funerals. 

We have found through it all the only true peace in these moments is when we slow our pace in step with God's and feel His love and provision in that moment alone.  When we simply abide, there is so much to be thankful for.  

Gratitude for how far we've come...   for the blessings of friends and family...   for the love of a wonderful church family...   for provision of our daily bread in overflowing abundance...   for a God that not only leads us, but carries us when we are too weary to step forward...   for kindness, generosity, and love...   for medical staff that do the healing work of God for the body and the soul...   for God's Word and it's living power in our lives...   for forgiveness and grace in us, through us, and for us...   for the blessings of brokenness...   for the marks of God's presence all around us...   for life beyond the grave...   for comfort in suffering...   for the gift of salvation...   for true HOPE.

For those of you who are local or blog friends, here is a link to our Christmas newsletter from 2010..  Thank you for spending many moments with us this past year.  Your support, encouragement, and prayers are a precious gift.

Hymns for Him

Our Sunday morning church service was an old-fashioned hymn sing.  We sang several traditional Christmas hymns.  Each one was introduced with a brief history of its origin.  It was fascinating to see how these mainstays of our holiday season came to be.  It is a powerful testament the way God used bankers, businessman, and commoners to pen some of the most well-known words used to praise His Son.  His ways are not our ways.

Our music was led by my own Uncle Dan- a pianist, music professor, composer, and doctor of his art (visiting from Houston).  It is such a treat to hear him play and a blessing to worship together.  They also took requests from the congregation to add some of our favorite hymns to the program.

It was a beautiful thing to be able to offer our hearts in praise through music.  The perfect addition to the Christmas celebration. As I thought about all the hymns and which ones stand out as favorites.  It's hard to choose.  I have to say, aside from all the traditional standards, this newer one stands out for me this year. Though usually sung at Easter, it's ideal for Christmas, too. We sang it during Advent at our home church.  As I read the words I can feel the crescendo rising in praise as it reaches the end.  I pray these words ring loud true in your heart this year, too...

Hear the heart of heaven beating, 

"Jesus Saves. Jesus saves."
And the hush of mercy breathing, 

"Jesus Saves. Jesus saves."
Hear the host of angels sing, 

"Glory to the Newborn King."
And the sounding joy repeating, "Jesus saves."


See the humblest hearts adore Him. 

"Jesus saves. Jesus saves."
And the wisest bow before Him. 

"Jesus saves. Jesus saves."
See the sky alive with praise, melting darkness in its place
There is life forevermore, 

"Jesus saves. Jesus saves."


He will live our sorrow sharing, 

"Jesus saves. Jesus saves."
He will die our burden bearing, 

"Jesus saves. Jesus saves."
"It is done!" will shout the cross, 

Christ has paid redemption's cost! 

While the empty tomb's declaring, 

"Jesus saves."


Freedom's calling, chains are falling, 

hope is dawning bright and true.
Day is breaking, night is quaking, 

God is making all things new.
"Jesus saves."


Oh to grace, how great a debtor! 

"Jesus saves. Jesus saves."
All the saints who shout together. 

"I know that Jesus saves."
Rising us so vast and strong lifting up salvation's song,
The redeemed will sing forever, the redeemed will sing forever, the redeemed will sing forever, 

"Jesus saves."

"Jesus saves."

Christmas Day

Christmas morning all the kids piled into bed with Mimi and Grandpa...

Didn't know you could fit that many in a double bed!

Then we all headed downstairs.  The kids were excited to sing Happy Birthday to Jesus.  We made a cake of doughnuts and they took turns blowing out the candles...

There were many happy smiles and surprises for everyone...

Then we read the Christmas story together and sang some of our favorite hymns.  this is the first year all the little voices are singing along.  It touches my heart and I pray it is music to God's ears, too.  Such a sweet time of worship...

After lunch we went over to visit Aunt Melba.  She is the kids' great-great-great aunt.  She does not have children of her own and loves to spend time with her nieces and nephews.  Despite several medical conditions and being legally blind, she faithfully hand writes and mails cards to the kids every week.  It has nurtured such a precious relationship.  I love to see their compassionate and servant hearts being formed in the process as they learn to put someone else above their own desires.


Then it was time to prepare for the family... the extended family.  Christmas night we hosted over 50 relatives from my dad's side of the family.  It is something we all look forward to all year.

Every chance we get to all be together from many corners of the world is the greatest present.  This year we have had to say goodbye to several family members, are missing those who couldn't be here, have battled several cases of cancer, and rejoice in the blessings of new babies. 

There were people in every room, on every floor of the house.  It was wonderful.  The way a house should feel.  I loved the look on Julia's face when she told me she was having a good time.  I asked her if she knew all these people were related to her.  "All of them?!", she said.

The kids love to see their cousins any chance they get.  I love the way they can jump right in and play no matter how long it's been...

We can't wait until this July when the gang descends on the beach in NC.  There are many more memories ahead...

And Sunday, the parties continued with my mom's side of the family...

 The food was amazing (london broil, pierogi casserole, pasta fagioli, baked pineapple, homemade pies, over two dozen kinds of homemade cookies and candies! and more) and the company even better!

This is the feeling of Christmas in our house... the ties that bind.

Christmas Eve

We headed up to PA to spend Christmas with family.  We decided to leave at 2am to make the most of our time by traveling at night.  The plan was the kids and I would sleep most of the trip.  Neither one of them has ever slept more than an hour in the car, even as infants, but here's hoping. We put them in the car asleep and they threw their blankets over their heads.  They should fall right back to sleep.  Nope.  It took two hours, but they were finally out from 4am until 7:30. 

They got a big kick out of eating breakfast at Cracker Barrel in their pajamas.  And an hour later we were there! I definitely had the easy end of this one.  Thanks, Honey!

The kids wasted no time jumping in to Christmas prep.  Mimi loves having her three little bakers in the kitchen.  Mammy was happy to lend a helping hand...

Then they got busy decorating the tree.  I love showing them the ornaments my sister and I made as kids hanging right alongside theirs.

It has become a Christmas tradition for the kids to each pick one of Mimi's nutcrackers and crack nuts.  They are fascinated by them.  It keeps them busy for quite a while as they crack the whole bag.  Not the tidiest method, but lots of fun and very yummy.

We enjoyed our annual cheese chowder meal before it was time to get ready for church.

The feeling of Christmas always hits me at the candlelight service... sitting in the same pews I have sat in for Christmas since I was a child... in the same little church... where almost half the choir are blood relatives... where the faces and hugs have known you since before you were even here.

It is in these quiet moments that Christmas begins to settle in my soul.

It is now.  It is still.  It is time.

All the meditation and preparation of advent comes down to this.  Is there room in my heart to fully receive Christ this Christmas? The room He deserves and asks? What kind of place has my soul prepared this season?

As the choir begins to sing, "O Holy Night", the tears fall.  Every year.  As the lights in the church dim, His light begins to shine greater and brighter.  In this dark and sinful world He comes like sunshine, filling every empty space, flooding the shadows.

As I watch Julia holding her candle, I am overwhelmed with gratitude for the gift of a healthy Christmas together.  It will never be taken for granted.  Last year she clutched her candle, wearing a mask, with her fuzzy head.  This year her curls fell gently in her face, as she smiled with rosy cheeks.  God's goodness has poured out in abundance.

We sat in the pews with our extended family, so blessed that uncle Jeff felt well enough to attend.  He was diagnosed with aggressive thyroid cancer in October and is traveling a tough road of surgeries, radiation, chemo, trachs, and feeding tubes.  Unfortunately, we are witnessing again how cancer can grab our lives and take hold in an instant.  But it is in Christmas that we find our HOPE.

The same God who created the world, created each one of us, reigns on the throne.  That same almighty God who holds the universe in the palm of His hand came to earth to suffer and die like one of us- to save us and bring us back home.  In our darkest hours and deepest sins, He lifts us up.  THAT is the gift of Christmas.  This tiny babe born in a stable, long ago...    

And for that HOPE we give thanks and rejoice with overwhelming gratitude.

Happy Birthday Jesus!!

Merry Christmas everyone!!

Polar Express Night

The holidays can be especially hard for those who have lost loved ones. For the families on our floor at Brenners, that loss is their child. Elizabeth's family decided they wanted to do something in her honor this year to love on the families who are admitted for Christmas. Thus was born Polar Express Night. The Kids of Childhood Cancer Foundation eagerly jumped on board. They had made the decision this year to sponsor 6 families in need from the oncology clinic. Having your child diagnosed with cancer is hard enough. When you struggle to make ends meet, heat your home, and have Christmas gifts for your kids things seem even more desperate.

We were so blessed to be a part of this event last week. All the board members and their families came out. We decorated for Christmas and brought some yummy goodies.

We had hot chocolate, cupcakes, cookies, and popcorn to eat while we watched Polar Express.

It was a fun night. We all love any opportunity to be on the floor, especially when it means loving on the families there.

Lilly was such a cuddle bug! She loves to talk, make new friends, and play.  She eagerly climbs up into the arms of anyone who smiles at her. This little one can grab your heart in an instant. We look forward to playing together again soon.

A piece of our hearts will always live on the 9th floor. We want to take every opportunity we can to give back and embrace those coming behind us. It is our privilege.

This is a club no family ever wants to join, but membership is instant, the bonds are immediate, deep, and last forever. As we celebrate Christmas and the blessings of time with our family and friends, joyous celebrations, and the birth of our Savior-a part of our hearts remains with our cancer family.  Cancer does not stop for holidays. The battle rages on.  Many of these families will celebrate in the hospital this year.  For some it is not the first time.  For sweet little Lilly, this is her 2nd (of 3 Christmas') spent here.  For those of us spending the holidays at home, our hearts will be split remembering the many cancer survivors, angels and those warriors still in the fight.

Like our buddy Vinny.  It was such a gift to see him feeling good and having fun with his friends.  He has had such a tough year and the fight continues.  Simple moments like this of two little boys laughing and playing are absolutely priceless and will never be taken for granted.

Christmas Around the World

Our Christmas celebration with our homeschool group this year was a Christmas Around the World celebration. Each family chose a country.  We researched how the people celebrate Christ's birth in that country and prepared a presentation for the group.

Carter was interested in doing an east African country close to where our Compassion International sponsored child lives.  We chose Ethiopia.  I didn't really know what to expect, but what we discovered was fascinating.  This country has a lot of Coptic Christians whose faith dates back to John Mark (author of the Bible's "Mark").  This region was evangelized just a few years after Christ's crucifixion and resurrection.  Their worship and traditions are so simple, pure, and heartfelt.  After thousands make the pilgrimage to one of the ancient underground churches, they prepare with fasting and prayer.  Then they stay up all night (standing) as they are led in candlelight service by the priests. As the sun rises on Christmas morning the celebration and singing peak and the fast is broken.  

As we watched the slideshow together, I couldn't help but marvel at the power of their worship for each individual even in a crowd of tens of thousands.  It is a deeply personal experience.  Then we enjoyed watching a video of a worship song.  Then the kids made a poster to share.  Carter listed all the important parts of the celebration and Julia made the map, flag, and dates. 

  
As we talked about what all these different worship practices mean, it was really striking how much of the world celebrates Christmas refraining from things of the world and spending time in prayer, while the western world uses the holidays to indulge in the things of the world, while frantically trying to find moments for prayer.  It really makes you think.

Each family brought a craft from their country.  We didn't have much to choose from in the way of crafts and activities, but when we saw this image, we knew it was the one.  The picture of three crosses has the name "Jesus" written in Amharic- the native language of Ethiopia.  It was the perfect symbol of their worship.

The other countries presented were Sweden, Mexico, and Romania.  The kids were so cute presenting to the group.  you could tell they were all really excited about what they had learned.  It is something we will definitely look forward to doing again!

Here are some of the fun crafts we made...

Then it was time to taste :) Each family prepared a holiday food from their country.  We feasted on Mexican hot chocolate, Romanian coznac, Swedish pepparkakor, and Ethiopian doro wat and injera.  All the food was delicious as we crossed 3 continents on one plate! I was really interested to try our recipe.  It is a traditional stew eaten in many African countries and I have never tried anything even close.  It is served with a flatbread called injera.  In their culture the injera is used as a plate and a spoon also.  Both were delicious and it is definitely something we will make again.

I love learning something I never knew before.  I hope this will be a part of our advent preparations for many years to come!

Backseat Theology

...overheard while riding in the van this afternoon...

Carter: Why don't the people at Fisher-Price make an Easter set like the nativity they make? They would only have to make a couple people.  We already have Mary and the angels.  We would just need Jesus, some soldiers, the cross, and the tomb.  But we would need some way to stick him up there...

Julia: I know... Honey.

Carter: Your dog, "Honey"? There aren't any animals in this story!

Julia: No, honey is sticky.  Or we could use syrup to stick him up there.  Then you could lick it.

Carter: Julia! This is Jesus! You can't lick Jesus!

Julia: Mo-om! Carter, said we can't lick Jesus? Is it okay to lick Jesus?

Carter: So we would need a cross and a tomb with a stone to roll away.  I think I'll make one out of play doh so it fits together better. The soldiers might be hard, too.  They have their uniforms and armor and swords...

All humor aside, it has really amazed me how much he thinks about the gift of Jesus at Christmas as a complete picture.  This baby in a manger was not just a gift to the world to spread God's love.  He also came to suffer and die for each of our sins and shortcomings.  The story does not end with the picturesque scene we see in our nativities.  It ends on a cross. We need to remember the whole story.

Out of the Mouths of Babes...

While we were making sugar cookies, the kids were choosing cookie cutters from the basket.  Carter held one up...

"How about the dollar sign?"

"Why did you pick that one?" (very curious where he was going with this!)

"Because Jesus paid the price for us all."

I couldn't have been more proud.

Christmas Surprises

Christmas is often the season of surprises and fun.  This year has been no different.

Daddy surprised Carter with tickets to the Toby Mac/Skillet concert.  He's a huge Toby Mac fan and couldn't believe he was going to see him in person.  The countdown began to the big night.  Billy said he watched intently taking it all in.  It wasn't until the next day that he started talking a mile a minute.  They had a great time.

One of the kids favorite routines in our house is Friday Sleep Anywhere Night.  They usually choose to sleep on the couch and think it's such a big deal.  Recently, they've forgotten to ask on Friday nights (and we don't remind them), so when we told them this Friday was Sleep Anywhere Christmas Campout Night, they were beyond thrilled. We set up their IKEA tent under the Christmas tree and decorate it with colored lights (we unplug them once they fall asleep).  Then we all pile on the couch to read our favorite Nativity books, sing Christmas songs, and do our devotions.

Saturday afternoon we were hanging out at home finishing up the Christmas card when I got a text from a friend saying, Do you and Julia want tickets to the Nutcracker performance in an hour? Her daughter was sick and they weren't able to go. (I felt so bad for them.)

Seriously?!?  We are actually going to the Nutcracker?! Right now?! It's always fun to surprise our kids, but it's even more amazing when the surprise is for both of us! I loved bringing out her dress as she sat and colored and telling her we were off to the ballet.  As the snow fell gently, we headed downtown.

She was so excited and had no idea what she was about to see. The theater was beautifully decorated, just like you would imagine. I couldn't believe we were actually here! As a former dancer myself, ballet is still close to my heart.  Taking my daughter to her first performance is one of those milestones I've dreamed about.  Last year she was too sick and this year we waited too long to buy tickets.  Little did I know the dream would be dropped right into our laps.

The show was beautiful.  Julia loved all the different characters, the story line, and the music.  She was excited that she recognized a lot of the score.

It was a day we will remember for a long time.

Saturday Night we surprised the kids with Family Night.  We headed to Lubranos for pizza- one of the kids' favorites. they can finish an entire large pizza themselves! Then we went to see the drive thru nativity.  They do such a good job of staging the entire Christmas story complete with all the people, sets, and live animals.

But, the story doesn't stop with the baby in a manger.  It continues to the cross and the empty tomb.  The true surprise and source of HOPE at Christmas.

No man could have ever written it this way.  A tiny baby, born to a teenage virgin, in an obscure town, far from home, fulfilling all the prophecies written 400 years before, who led a sinless life, and suffered and died so that we can stand forgiven before our holy God. 

It is the greatest surprise in human history and it is given to each one of us.  All we have to do is reach out and receive it.