Feeney's Fans

Okay, confession time.  I am totally hooked on...

They just opened a store 2 miles from our house, right next to our bank and grocery store.  Sadly, I haven't even needed to use those as an excuse.  They opened last weekend and were giving away free frozen yogurt to everyone.  We happily waited in the 20 min line and would have done it again! It is an adorable store, like a party...

Their frozen yogurt is delicious! They make 10 flavors each day and have a topping bar of 50 items from fresh farmer's market peaches to heath bars to hot fudge.  And everything in between.  The flavors choices are so unique and it's good for you! Low or nonfat, probiotics, active cultures and less than 100 calories a serving.  The great part is you pay by weight.  The four of us can make our own sundaes for less than $10!

Julia didn't even make it to the register before ashe stopped for a taste...

Mmmmmm!

We love us some Feeney's! I have to confess I have had it every day this week.  It started with free yogurt, then I became their friend on FB and receive the daily flavors, then I discovered the $2-to-go freezer! Yikes! I have not regretted a single taste so far.  I love the Key Lime Tart, Peanut Butter Cheesecake, Triple Chocolate, Hazlenut Cappucino, Pink Lemonade, and Pistachio Nut.

So if you're ever heading to Feeney's and want company, I'll meet you there (if I'm not there already!).

The Mother Load... moments of holy in the midst of the messy, mundane, and chaos.

Do you ever have one of those days when it hits you so fully that you are indeed a mother?

For some it's the first time they hold their child, or the first time they quiet their crying baby, or the first "mama", or the first time they are puked on.


For others it's on an ordinary day with a car full of kids in car seats and a full agenda.

I had one of those days recently. It went something like this..

6:30am   Wake to discover the cat's accidents on carpet and clean up mess.

6:40am   Morning quiet time. I love ending with daily readings from "Jesus Calling"

7:00am   Joined by little feet needing morning cuddles.

7:10am   Start a load of laundry. Shower while kids get dressed and bring all their concerns, issues, and disagreements to me to solve in the shower.

7:30am   Pack lunches, make breakfast, and put dinner in the cooler to drop off to friends later.

7:35am   Clean Carter's ear and face from ear tube drainage overnight.  Note to self: Call ENT!

7:40am   Pack car for VBS, picnic lunch, Safety Town, doctor's appts, play dates, and library.

7:55am   Dozen or so trips from car to house later, switch laundry, and pull out of driveway. Drink breakfast smoothie in the car. Forgot coffee :(

8:00am   Arrive at church, haul in all our bins and bags, and set up for today's games at VBS. Pass off meal for someone else to drop off. (Thank you!!)

8:15am   Change Julia pants. First accident of the day.

8:20am   Greet preschoolers and head to worship rally.

8:30am   Sneak out to make appt with ENT for Carter

8:40am   Awesome friend delivers my favorite Starbucks coffee to VBS!! Enjoy sweet time of worship with 487 kids.

8:50am   First group of VBS kids in games: 12 kids, 3 games, one potty break, 3 runny noses, 1 time out... and repeat 4 more times.

9:30am   Snack time for 55. Pray, pass, pour, spill, wipe, wash, refill, repeat.

9:50am   Back to games to finish last 4 groups.

10:10am   Stop everything to sit down with a group of preschoolers who wanted to share how cancer has impacted their own lives. (They had heard me share Julia's cancer story in worship the day before.)

12:00pm   Deep breath. Quick bathroom break. Lots of smiles from the morning's activities. Boisterous goodbyes. Pick up Carter upstairs, Julia down the hall, pack up, and load car. Change Julia again.

12:15pm   Switch Julia's car seat for afternoon playdate. Does anyone else have a love/hate relationship with car seats? Man I love them, but they are work! Pass her and her gear and head off to Safety Town.

12:35pm   Arrive at Safety Town. Picnic lunch on the lawn and finish daily homework for ST.

1:00pm   Check in Carter.

1:15pm   Stop at library to return books and pay fine. Whew, relief to not be a felon for a while :) Note to self: do not let the kids' persuasive talents convince meet to check out DVDs ever again. They are always late!

1:40pm   Stop at Target for new underwear for the kids.

1:55pm   Stop at Petsmart for more fish tank filters.

2:15pm   Grocery shop at Costco. Check voicemail and return phone calls.

2:45pm   Drop off cold food at Daddy's office for refrigeration.

3:00pm   Pick up Carter at Safety Town and head to ENT appt. Find out that he prayed to accept Christ today at VBS!! Brief conversation to be continued later...

3:30pm   See ENT. Carter has severe infection in his tubs and is pulsating fluid. Doc cleans and vacuums it out. I need one of those at home! I can think of all kinds of uses. He just took the bulb syringe up 20 notches!  Three prescriptions and a follow-up appt later and we're out the door.

3:50pm   Stop at shoe store. Carter has outgrown his sneakers-again! Find shoes, but none in his size. Head to next shoe store, same trouble. Why do my kids always seem to wear the most popular size in the county?!

4:35 pm   Pick up Julia. Give kids a snack. Change her again. Switch back car seats.

5:15pm Meet Daddy for "dollar tacos" to celebrate Carter's big decision today. Love that place! Delicious fresh food and can't beat the price.

6:00pm   Take Carter to get sneakers at third shoe store of the day. He needs them for tomorrow.

6:30pm   Stop to pick up prescriptions at the pharmacy.

6:50pm   Finally return home for the first time today and unload.

Does everyone else's car look this way at the end of a busy day?

7:05pm   Put away groceries, check the mail, switch the laundry, return phone calls, give the cat her medicine, make the kids a snack, water the garden, give them showers, give everyone their medicine and vitamins, brush teeth, read books, wrestle Carter's ear drops in, talk more about the meaning of salvation, say prayers, and tuck them in.

8:25pm   Whew! It's time to sit down for a quick breather. Time to plan the games for tomorrow's VBS, lay out clothes, finish laundry, catch up with hubby, work on Bible study, read blogs, return emails.

10:30pm   Crawl into bed for quiet time with God and sleep.

These are the days I realize, in every sense of the word, I am a mother. And as crazy as it all seems sometimes, there are so may moments in each and every day when God gives us a glimpse of the holy... in the midst of the messy, mundane, and chaotic.

I pray that I have eyes to see, ears to hear, and a heart to experience these daily. I pray I take the time daily, as many times as it takes, to center my thoughts on Him and find calm and peace in any storm. May I never be too busy to drop everything to turn my full attention to God's calling in the moment whether with my children, my husband, a friend, or a stranger. In all of the crazy busyness off the day, there were moments of pure worship, times of tender loving care for a child, laughs with friends, tough conversations with kids about cancer, sharing Biblical truth, and decisions made for Christ!

All of this on an "ordinary day". But that's just how God works. It's not something we orchestrate, prepare for or plan. It just happens.   And usually when we least expect it.

Confession Time

I try to keep my words on this blog real and give a realistic picture of what we experience, but despite good intentions, it doesn't always happen.  It's just not human nature to regularly publish our failures, insecurities, weaknesses, and sins, but that doesn't make them any less real.  I have showed my sink full of dishes and messes on the floor, revealed my doubts and fears, and ranted a little.  I just feel this pressing need to shatter the image that it's possible to get it all together.  Here are some of the frustrations I struggle with on a regular basis...

• I like to take my time getting started in the mornings.  We are generally awake a good 1-2 hours before we get out of bed for the day.
• When I am stressed, overwhelmed, hungry, tired, or sad- I yell.  It breaks my heart that I do and I feel convicted as soon as I do it and see the look in my kids faces, but I still yell.  I have also thrown things (never at the kids), slammed doors, and rolled my eyes.  Not the best role model.
• I am a people person and am energized by being around others.  When we don't get out, I slip very quickly into depression and become less available to my kids.  I then crave the social interaction and connection from emails, blogs, and facebook and ignore my children.  
• I do not regularly clean my house.  I do like to organize and have a touch of OCD that keeps things relatively neat.  However, clean is a whole other ballgame.  Aside from vacuuming, some lysol, and wiping counters, the rest is rare.
• I am a horrible procrastinator! But also a type A perfectionist and over-achiever.  I was already pulling all-nighters in middle school working on big projects and papers.  And it only got worse.  In college I could do a 3pg paper in an hour, 5pgs overnight and 20pgs in a weekend.  Unfortunately I am still the same way.  I do my best work under pressure and don't plan ahead well at all.  Sadly my desire to do things well, makes me not want to even attempt it if I can't give it my full attention.  I have left so many things undone.
• There are weeks we homeschool everyday and weeks we don't do even one day.  A consistent schedule has definitely not been our strong suit lately.
• I have found myself at times encouraging my kids to watch something on TV even if they were happily doing something else because I wanted a break or nap.
• At my best I exercise 3 times a week, but more often once every 3 weeks.  I'm optimistic it will improve when the weather gets warmer.  I really want to be able to wear all the clothes in my closet.
• I hate that it takes me forever to get back to people by email, phone, mail, etc.  It is not unusual to be weeks or months.  I think about it and often plan out everything I want to say, but my follow through stinks.  I am often late or miss special events because of my own disorganization.  There is no excuse.  Good intentions are not enough.
• I suffer from the same 'mommy guilt' every mom feels.  I really think it's the enemy's way of keeping us ineffective.  After all, when your home for long periods with lots of small children, you will falter... repeatedly.  We can't keep all these balls in the air.  At least one will always fall, sometimes more, sometimes all of them.  And we are all human.

So, take a deep breath.  Stop beating yourself up and don't be afraid to get real with those you meet.  I think our greatest gift to each other is transparency.  We all have such unique journeys and struggles to share.  That is the essence of out testimony.  All we have to do is be open with those around us.  There is no greater danger to our well-being as moms than comparing ourselves to one another especially when so many are putting up a false front.  If we all just let our guard down a little and kept it real, our burdens will get so much lighter.  I'm just a sinner saved by grace and thankful for His mercies, new every morning.  I pray I can encourage others to walk victoriously in His grace with our heads held high. 

(And this makes me feel much better and reminds me of my goal.)

Seasonal Selections

I don't know why I do this to myself!

I get hooked on products that are only available for a limited time..... and I do it every year. In the winter, it's Celestial Seasonings Candy Cane Lane decaf green tea with Peppermint Mocha creamer. It's pure heaven in a cup to me. I buy up several containers of both when it's on sale at the end of the season, but the inevitable day always comes. The supply runs out. Today I opened my last box of tea :(

Well, fortunately I can move onto my next seasonal obsession............ :) There is hope!

Unfortunately this one comes with way more calories. Who is the crazy mastermind that decided to put out GS cookies right before bathing suit season?! And next season for me is Cadbury Mini Eggs. Luckily my kids like the cookies and chocolate, too, so I won't be the only one eating them :)

Everything's Under Control

I went upstairs the other day and this is what I found in Carter's room....Apparently, the Marines have landed on the Island of Sodor. You can rest at ease they have everything under control.......

Well, speaking of control. On Friday I was reminded that I have very little.

I think as parents we have this illusion that we can control our kids behavior, especially when they're young and can be moved and removed at our whim. When in all truth we are influencing their behavior, but not controlling it. They choose the behavior, we only choose the consequences. This became blazingly obvious at Carter's 5 year well-check last Friday. He is very familiar with doctor's and what happens there. He knew he was getting a shot, but not too upset about it. He actually loves having his blood drawn and watching the blood go up the tube.

The nurse comes in to start the appointment with his hearing test and he refuses. She took the time to explain it to him, encourage him- no luck. Now note that this kid has had 3 ear surgeries. He's had a dozen hearing tests, no biggy, he thinks its like playing a game. Well not today. We gave him the stern, "You must cooperate." No luck. We made three trips to the bathroom for a talking to and loss of privileges and still nothing. (And you can't spank them with the doctor standing right outside the bathroom door.) He finally did do it, barely. And things just got worse. He refused to open his mouth, take deep breaths, touch his toes, lay on the table. By this point he is pretty much restricted from everything except eating and sleeping. Even the doctor was shocked and told him he was not getting a sticker or goody bag (everyone does). I was waiting for the floor to open up and just swallow me. We were at an absolute loss and never saw this coming. He has never acted this way. In fact I have never had a child act this way. I have taken dozens of children to over 200 appointments, of all kinds, and I have never had a child act this way. So what would you do?

It was a long drive home. I couldn't help but feel defeated and a failure as the tears rolled down my cheeks. What could I have done differently? It just drove home for me how little we can actually control.

The next morning Carter had another appointment for an eye recheck. This time, absolute angel. Did everything the doctor asked, used all his manners, and was as pleasant as could be. I couldn't believe it was the same kid less than 24 hours later.

So I guess we all have bad days sometimes, I sure have. We all just hope no one sees them, but sometimes it's bound to happen with our kids, and with ourselves.

Well, Monday is off to the dentist with both kids, so wish us luck :)

Dear Diaper Dudes....

To the makers of Huggies and Pamper's products,

I am grateful for diapers and the ease and cleanliness they have brought to my life. It's been five years, two kids, and we're almost done :) (I don't really want to know how much I've spent, please.) You guys obviously know kids well and adorn your products with cute characters of all kinds. Carter loved his Cars pull-ups and Julia likes her Mickey diapers at bedtime, but you have made a serious oversight. The same way kids become obsessed with this characters, they become obsessed with 'certain' characters. With Carter is was the pull-ups with the piston cup trophies (who doesn't want the trophy?). He wanted only those at night (which is every other one). Some nights he would get up in the middle of the night and change a dry one, just for the picture! With Julia it's the Mickey and Minnie diapers, she does not want to wear the Pluto and Mickey ones. If it were up to them they would throw away half the package.

So please, pick one design and use it all the way through. You know kids are creatures of habit, that's why you make the designs in the first place. Save all us parents out there one more battle with our kids. We can use all the help we can get :)


Thank you.

Dear Milton Bradley.......

We LOVE your games! For over 100 years you have brought joy, family fun, and learning to millions of families. Some of my fondest moments as a child are playing your games with my family and that tradition now extends to my own children. One of the very first games Carter learned to play was Hi Ho! Cherry-O! And now Julia has learned, too. I still love picking those little plastic cherries off the tree, BUT...

I don't know what you guys are thinking! The game comes with exactly 40 cherries- just enough for 4 trees. You guys have been in the game-making business for over 100 years. Have you met preschoolers? Could there be a smaller piece to have to keep track of?! These things are miniscule! I feel like the mean ogre mommy frantically counting and checking to be sure they're all there. Now I know you are great user-friendly company and all we have to do is call the 800 number for more, but seriously who has time for that? It's hard enough to make the time to play games!

So, next time could you give us just one extra?
Pretty please with a cherry on top?

And babies make 4!

We've had a fun and crazy week around here (April 4-12). Our sweet nephew Mason came to stay with us while his family was in FL. He fit right in and the kids loved having a baby to dote on.
Carter had fun feeding him and Julia liked to teach him new things. Whenever he would get excited and squeal, she'd scold "no fream, no fream!" I think she liked having someone to boss around. Though she had some difficulty giving up her "youngest" spot, and we saw a lot of the pouty lip. Baby Izzy was here, too, to bring us to a total of 4. Hectic is not quite sufficient, crazy is probably better. It amazes me how 4 kids can be so happy for an hour and then the same 4 can all cry for an hour. I always felt at least 2 steps behind. I remember sitting at the kitchen table trying desperately to eat my breakfast at 11am with Izzy on my lap, Julia on my foot, Mason on my leg, and Carter in a heap on the floor. I couldn't help but think- is this really what Jesus meant when he said "let the little children come to me".......all of them? at the same time?
leaky diapers, whiny voices, and all?
I'm reminded just how much I need Him to get through. I cannot possibly meet everyone's needs at once, no matter how many and I have to stop trying. I do not have the ability, but He does. I do not have the patience, but He does, and all I have to do is ask. My best days were the ones when I took the time, no matter how brief to stop, get in His Word, and ask for His grace, energy, and encouragement. Sometimes as moms I think we have to come to the end of ourselves before we remember we weren't made to do this alone, no matter how lonely it may seem at times.
The hardest day was probably after Mason's stomach infection set in. I woke up early to get Mason and found Chloe had been sick in the playroom and had gone to the bathroom in the hall. As I'm cleaning the carpet I smell something behind me- this is never good. I turn around to find Mason standing in a puddle of poo that had escaped his diaper, soaked his footie pajamas and crawled with him all over the hall and kitchen. Where do I even start? This is one of those mommy moments when you honestly pause for a minute to try think of a way out. Am I really the one that has to do this and where on earth do I start?! I stripped him, bathed him, and dressed him- cleaned disinfected and scrubbed- and prepared to be more optimistic. I heard Julia and went to get her to be greeted by the tell-tale smell. She too had gone through her diaper, her pajamas (in volume, not illness thank goodness!) and her sheets. More laundry... By the time I had Julia ready to go, Mason had gone again and now Izzy joined in on the action. Time to break out the plastic pants- for everyone in this house!! It's not even 8:30am! These are the days it's hard as a mom to see the joy and lasting value. I feel trapped in a house that I cannot possibly get truly clean, it's too cold to go outside, and the bodily fluids are flowing in unpredictable fashion- calgon take me away!!
I don't want you to think it was all bad. there were a lot of laughs and sweet moments in between the craziness. The kids had fun getting to know each other.
And there were many moments we couldn't do anything but laugh. And I learned to appreciate my husband in a whole new way. I couldn't wait to see him at the end of the day to have someone to talk to and have an extra set of hands. He even let me go to Ladies Night and held down the fort on his own. Thanks for all the playing, errands, baths, diapers, laundry, rocking, and dishes! Honey- you rock!

I'm Hooked

My current addictions.....

It could be worse right?

I go through phases of things I'm hooked on and right now it's Gummy Calci-vites and tulips. I know totally random. I've always loved tulips, so delicate and perfect. The way they grow and change every day. It just screams hope and new life. And the timing could not be better. Every winter as the dreary coldness and sickness trudges on seemingly neverending- it happens. The tulips appear in stores. Like a small bright light saying, "spring's right around the corner!", "hang on it's coming :) " My hubby sent me beautiful tulips for Valentine's Day this year. The kids appreciate them, too. When they arrived at the house- Carter said, "Look, Daddy sent me flowers!" And he loved cutting and arranging them. Julia points them out and says "fwo-wer". I enjoyed every day and was so sad to see them go. Thankfully, Harris Teeter had an answer to my problem- "2.99 tulips" They have graced my counter every week since and brought a smile to my face :)

And then there's the vitamins and I use that term loosely. These things taste exactly like candy and I know you all know that, too. I'm not the only one out their who sneaks a flintstones. I bought them for the kids and they loved them. I made the mistake of following them with the fish oil version and they were tainted for good. They weren't about to try again. So what to do with the new bottle? They're mine now. Each one is 100mg of calcium, so that means 5-10 a day- yes! If you're like every other woman in America you don't get near your RDA for calcium- especially if you've had kids, they leech it right out of our bones-literally! So, how to keep from downing the whole bottle. I use them as personal rewards- unload the dishwasher=2, fold laundry=2, put it away=3, etc. I know, I sound like a kid- but it works, so I'm sticking to it. Thank goodness for Costco.

Some of my other current addictions...

• kix and chocolate chips, yummo!
• ice water with lemon juice
• lip gloss
• checking email
  
• Dove chocolate squares- sweet, melting paradise :)
• Eucerin Plus hand cream- finally one that works!
• yoga pants- no waistbands, a mom's best friend
• mary jane crocs- I had to do something for my aging body- the dollar bin variety were no longer cutting it
• reading blogs
  
• ice cubes gum

What are yours?

Confessions...(sorry Mom)

When Billy is out of town for work, there are many nights I go to bed with the kitchen a mess. I know my Mom would be aghast that I could sleep knowing it looked this way :) But I'm fine with it. Now in my defense, I think it matters that I'm not leaving it for someone else to do- I am the "someone else". I've just found my nighttime hours to be so precious to my sanity, well-being, and spiritual health. Getting to spend an hour (or sometimes 2, 3, 4 hours...) doing 'my thing' in the nice clean living room while it's quiet and peaceful...aahhh :) perfection. The amazing thing is, as much as I dread doing this at night it only takes me 20 minutes after breakfast and I'm happy to do it. So hopefully Mom can forgive me on this one :)