Why we love spring...

The Difference a Year Makes

This time of year will always be an emotional time. It was one year ago that we faced every parents deepest fear- unknown pain and suffering in your child.

It was a typical weekend (April 2007). Julia had an ear infection the week before, but never seemed bothered by it. We noticed some red spots on her legs after her nap. We thought hives or maybe the beginning of chicken pox. We gave her Benadryl before bed, but within 2 hours things when quickly downhill. She woke up screaming, rash everywhere, eyes swollen shot, entire body swollen, scared and in pain. We called the doctor and were told to give her more Benadryl. No change. She continue screaming through the night. By morning the rash was everywhere.
The splotches were dark and varying colors like targets all over. Her limbs were painfully swollen and she was bruised all over. We prepared to take her to the Sunday hours at our peds office. They wouldn't give her an appointment till the afternoon, but I took her right in anyway. The nurses took her right back when they saw and heard her. Everyone in the building came in to see for themselves. I was beginning to get nervous.
Dr. E came in , took one look at her and said it was an allergic reaction to her amoxicillin. He didn't even examine her- didn't even have me take her clothes off. He sat across the room from me with a smirk on his face and nonchalantly said, "Give her lots of advil, tylenol, and benadryl, and take lots of pictures to show your friends- you'll laugh about this one day." You could have picked up my jaw off the floor. I felt like I'd just been punched. I said, "No steroids?" he said "No, the same thing happened to my kid when they were little, she's fine- doesn't need them." I could have choked him, but I was a mom on a mission and I was going to take care of my baby at all costs. I scooped her up, left the office, and went home to pack our things. My mother's intuition kicked in and I finally listened to God's voice in my heart. I knew what she needed and I wasn't waiting for this crazy doctor to give me permission! I took her myself to Brenner's Childrens Hospital. I walked in and we were taken right back, triaged, and put in a room with 2 doctors. They immediately suspected a severe allergic reaction and jumped into action to confirm it. They brought in pediatricians, infectious disease specialists, and allergists. It felt like such a safe place. I was nervous for Julia and hated to see her suffering, but I had such peace knowing we were exactly where we needed to be. She continued to get worse. Her rash was growing and changing right before our eyes, the edema was worse, and she was bleeding internally. I could tell the doctor's were concerned. They had her admitted. It took 2 sweet nurses almost an hour to start an IV. These are the moments you are so thankful to be in a specialty hospital. They have such a gift for this. I still remember walking into our room in the middle of the night. It was so quiet. We were both exhausted, but wide awake. They got us settled and I sat down on the couch with her. She immediately sunk into my chest and fell asleep for the first time in 2 days. I can still go back to that moment- the smell of her hair, kissing the top of her head, as my tears fell in her hair. I just wanted to take her suffering from her. I continued to pray and plead and ask the Holy Spirit to intercede when my words failed me. I was in a place I had been with both my kids before- giving them back over to God- knowing they are His and He will use me care for them, I just have to let go and reach out with open hands.It was a trying week. It took several days before all the teams could confirm the diagnosis and agree on a treatment plan. During that time, they couldn't do much to help. We began to feel "famous" at the hospital. We saw so many doctors, residents, med students, and professors. Everyone wanted to see for themselves. We soon became a teaching case everyone wanted in on. This is not something that they see very often and she had the textbook symptoms. Her official diagnosis was ertythma multiforme with vasculitis- basically a severe allergic reaction in which her immune system is compromised. They don't know why it happens in some people (though a viral interaction is suspected). The fear is that it progresses into life-threatening stages called SJS and TENS. Fortunately, once steroids were started she responded within only a few hours. Praise God! It was like seeing a miracle right in front of our eyes. The swelling and lesions went away so fast you could actually watch them disappear. She felt such relief and was able to sleep in the crib for the first time in 4 days. She was so peaceful. It was such a testimony to be able to share her healing with everyone in the hospital. It was so rapid, people who had seen her the day before came back because they didn't believe the reports. God is so good- in suffering and in healing!
It was such an incredible feeling that washed over me in waves. You can feel yourself being carried. I could feel God's presence and the prayers of all our friends and family. It reminded me of a favorite song..."we all need sheltering trees, friends in our lives who get down on their knees, to lift us up before the King of Kings..." The prayers of loved ones are never underestimated. they are the most powerful tool we have.

Once they knew she was responding we were sent home on 3 weeks of steroids and pain meds and told to keep her isolated for several weeks until her immune system recovered. The rash was healing well and the bruising and swelling would, too in several weeks. Carter finally got to come visit the day we brought her home. He had such fun playing with her in the playroom- what a great place for kids :) It was so sweet to see her love on her. he was so relieved to have his sister back and know she was okay- and so were we.

I have learned several things through all of this...

• to trust my instincts as a mother
• When I've exhausted my experience and the doctor is not answering my questions, head to the nearest children's hospital- they are the experts- and a huge blessing!
  
• Be an advocate for my child, keep their medical records in my possession, and never be afraid to speak up on their behalf. Know your doctor's, urgent care centers, and hospitals and how and when to use each. Don't assume any doctor will be able to give your child the treatment they need.
  
• Pray daily to give them over to God. There is no safer place to be than firmly in His grasp
• God gives us fully the grace we need to sustain us right where we are.
  

Sadly, we have come full circle and are back at Brenners. Our sweet friend Allison has been in great pain and distress for the past two weeks. After countless painful tests and procedures, a gifted resident diagnosed her with discitis. She has a staph infection in her lumbar space and an abscess in the neighboring muscle. This causes severe pain and prevents her from walking. This is such an answer to prayer in that it's acute and easily treatable, however she has 3 more weeks of heavy medications and pain ahead of her. Patrick and Shana felt the same grace and security being at Brenners. However they also had the notorious designation of being the case in the hospital that everyone wanted to see. This is something neither of us hope to achieve again. We are so blessed to have such a fabulous hospital for our kids. We felt right at home on the 8th floor, though I must say I had some flashbacks of Julia crying and not being able to make it any better. The kids jumped right in to their surroundings. (You know you're in a special place when your kids think a hospital is fun.) It was priceless seeing the look on Allison's face when she woke up and saw Julia. Through all of this one of the few things that has cheered her up is seeing her little friends :) It brings a mom to tears seeing them minister to each other. The way Julia sat in her crib and smoothed her hair. The way Allison lit up when they played music class together......
It's going to be a long recovery for Allison. Please keep her in your prayers as she deals with excruciating pain and the frustrating disability of not being able to move around and just be a toddler. Pray for her complete healing and relief during this time. And lift up Patrick and Shana as they care for her, tirelessly around the clock, carrying her everywhere, trying to comfort her, and not being able to relieve her pain.

Carolina Spring

I love spring in NC! It kind of sneaks up on you. We get a few days of warmth and then winter is back. The cold, icy, windy, wetness that holds us hostage inside. Then when you think it's finally here, the intense weather arrives- wind, downpours, thunder, hail, heat, frost- all in a week's span. It is an awesome reminder of God's power and the majesty of His creation. When it's finally here the wait was worth it. I'm just in awe of the beauty every year. I love the intense colors- the sky is deep blue, the leaves so fresh and green, and all the flowers perfect and bright.We spent a glorious Friday outside with our friends soaking up the sun and letting the warmth brighten our spirits.
The day was capped off perfectly with ice cream and friends in the backyard!
Not 24 hours later, the temperature had dropped 40 degrees, the rains were back and we were eating our ice cream in the car.
Then we waited for spring to return. It's during this season that I'm reminded of the meaning of faith- believing in things unseen and hoping for tomorrow. As we all know the best things come to those who wait and that is always true with the beauty of spring.
We had some crazy weather in between. A freak afternoon storm popped up one Saturday. The sky turned green the wind whipped, the rain poured out of the sky like a waterfall, and hail rained down pummeling everything below.

It was hard to believe, even seeing it. In the end it looked as if we'd had a snowstorm. The sun came out and we all went outside.
The kids loved the "snow" and had a snowball fight and made a snowman- unbelievable. I haven't seen that much water come from the sky in a long time. The people in this area have been praying for rain for so long and God sure answered that prayer today!

After the much needed rains- the cold, windy days returned again. We were all starting to go a little crazy spending so much time inside, so we decided to bundle up and brave the cold...
With spring comes one of our families most favorite activities...baseball! We anxiously await the start of the Grasshoppers season every year. This year Julia was in all the excitement. She went to get her shirt out of her room yelling "ball game, ball game!" There is something magical about Horizons park and it fills all of us every time we visit. This year was no different...

It was a thrilling game! In the first inning their were 2 home runs and the victory fireworks. The second inning, another home run AND a grand slam! The fans went wild and we did, too. julia was so cute dancing to all the music :) Carter had a ball, too. The big kids that play baseball on the hill let him play this year- he was beaming.
It was, however, one of the coldest games we've ever been to- temps just barely in the 50s and the wind was bitterly cold and painful. Julia got daddy to feed her, so she didn't even have to take her hands out of her pockets...

Happy Easter! (a recap)

We headed to DC for Easter to Mimi and Grandpa's- hoping it wouldn't snow like it did last year. It was cold enough, but no snow this year. The kids were excited and are understanding more every year. Carter knows the resurrection story and can tell it himself now. he's been doing a great job learning all his scriptures this year. It's a new experience to see Jesus though the eyes of a child and to get excited about their new understanding. This year he has learned the hymn "Christ the Lord is Risen Today" and was thrilled when we sang it in church because he knew the words.
Carter remembered everything we had done last year, so he was excited to do it again and reminded us of anything we forgot. They did good with the eggs. Julia helped cook them. She started out gently putting them in and soon switched to throwing. I managed to catch all but one.

They loved the dye- "pretty". They are still so fascinated by the whole process.
We then moved on to cookies, which needless to say was an even bigger hit. I didn't know Julia's whole hand fit in her mouth, but full of icing, it does. She was happy to share with anyone who wanted a finger lick.

























After a yummy Sunday brunch, we decided to make plates for the Marines on duty. Carter and Julia were thrilled to go visit the "ooh-rahs" again. They were thrilled to see all the food and treats. We couldn't help but smile at Carter who was donning his bunny ears for the excursion :)
We spent the rest of the week enjoying the sites of DC. We always have to ride the metro. Carter can actually navigate the map and stops himself now. (If he ever runs away, he'd probably wind up in DC on Mimi's doorstep.) We discovered a new museum this time- The National Building Museum. It has breathtaking architecture...


...and lots of hands on activities for kids. We made some great new friends, discovered new books, and built and created the day away. We spent the whole morning there and had so much fun the kids begged to go back the next day. This one will definitely be added to our regular list.
Carter also played lots of racquetball. He's actually getting pretty good and gets some good volleys going. He keeps you on your toes! Look out! (Don't worry Mimi he forgives you for nailing him in the eye.)

And babies make 4!

We've had a fun and crazy week around here (April 4-12). Our sweet nephew Mason came to stay with us while his family was in FL. He fit right in and the kids loved having a baby to dote on.
Carter had fun feeding him and Julia liked to teach him new things. Whenever he would get excited and squeal, she'd scold "no fream, no fream!" I think she liked having someone to boss around. Though she had some difficulty giving up her "youngest" spot, and we saw a lot of the pouty lip. Baby Izzy was here, too, to bring us to a total of 4. Hectic is not quite sufficient, crazy is probably better. It amazes me how 4 kids can be so happy for an hour and then the same 4 can all cry for an hour. I always felt at least 2 steps behind. I remember sitting at the kitchen table trying desperately to eat my breakfast at 11am with Izzy on my lap, Julia on my foot, Mason on my leg, and Carter in a heap on the floor. I couldn't help but think- is this really what Jesus meant when he said "let the little children come to me".......all of them? at the same time?
leaky diapers, whiny voices, and all?
I'm reminded just how much I need Him to get through. I cannot possibly meet everyone's needs at once, no matter how many and I have to stop trying. I do not have the ability, but He does. I do not have the patience, but He does, and all I have to do is ask. My best days were the ones when I took the time, no matter how brief to stop, get in His Word, and ask for His grace, energy, and encouragement. Sometimes as moms I think we have to come to the end of ourselves before we remember we weren't made to do this alone, no matter how lonely it may seem at times.
The hardest day was probably after Mason's stomach infection set in. I woke up early to get Mason and found Chloe had been sick in the playroom and had gone to the bathroom in the hall. As I'm cleaning the carpet I smell something behind me- this is never good. I turn around to find Mason standing in a puddle of poo that had escaped his diaper, soaked his footie pajamas and crawled with him all over the hall and kitchen. Where do I even start? This is one of those mommy moments when you honestly pause for a minute to try think of a way out. Am I really the one that has to do this and where on earth do I start?! I stripped him, bathed him, and dressed him- cleaned disinfected and scrubbed- and prepared to be more optimistic. I heard Julia and went to get her to be greeted by the tell-tale smell. She too had gone through her diaper, her pajamas (in volume, not illness thank goodness!) and her sheets. More laundry... By the time I had Julia ready to go, Mason had gone again and now Izzy joined in on the action. Time to break out the plastic pants- for everyone in this house!! It's not even 8:30am! These are the days it's hard as a mom to see the joy and lasting value. I feel trapped in a house that I cannot possibly get truly clean, it's too cold to go outside, and the bodily fluids are flowing in unpredictable fashion- calgon take me away!!
I don't want you to think it was all bad. there were a lot of laughs and sweet moments in between the craziness. The kids had fun getting to know each other.
And there were many moments we couldn't do anything but laugh. And I learned to appreciate my husband in a whole new way. I couldn't wait to see him at the end of the day to have someone to talk to and have an extra set of hands. He even let me go to Ladies Night and held down the fort on his own. Thanks for all the playing, errands, baths, diapers, laundry, rocking, and dishes! Honey- you rock!

We're still here!!!

I know many of you think we've fallen of the face of the earth. I promise we didn't. Some of us may have considered jumping at times (but only for a split second), but we're all here and doing fine. It's been unpredictably CRAZY around here. The past month has been travel, Easter, rain rain and more rain, cold snaps and frost, cabin fever, new flowers, glimpses of spring, some soccer, lots of pint-sized guests in our house, quite a few days of bodily functions all over the house, Julia learning to really talk and Carter learning to read!, a trip to the ER, a fabulous new camera, and lots of time with friends.

But don't worry I'll catch you up on everything real soon! Stay tuned...

Ju-Ju-isms

Life with a 21 month old is full of surprises and sweet moments that make you smile, which is a good thing because lately there are also frustration tantrums when she isn't allowed to do something. As Julia approaches "two" (I am shocked at how freely I say that because inside I yearn for my baby), many of those laughs come from the cute things she says...

"PEE-PIECE"= pizza, loves the stuff- Our family splits a large pizza into equal quarters. We eat a lot of pizza around here. We've been going to Lubranos weekly for pizza and Julia stands in her high chair and dives after the waitresses as they walk by with food- you'd think she never eats! Her cute smile and wave help as we peel her off the food of our fellow patrons.

"MOMAS"= Thomas the Tank Engine, a favorite of hers, thanks to her big brother, she can also name most of the other engines, too. When did she learn all this?

"A-DORE, A-DO"= Dora and Diego

"TOE-EY"= Chloe the cat, she bellows this in a loud singsong voice that sends Chloe running to higher ground- Chloe's been around toddlers long enough to know better (though she does kiss Julia on the nose every night before bed) Imagine Elmyra Duff from Tiny Toons "I'm gonna hug you and kiss you and love you forever! I love kittens, I love kitties, love them into itty-bitties!" That's Julia :)

"BWESS ME"= God Bless You, her response when anyone coughs or sneezes. We've tried to coorect her and say "bless YOU", to which she says "bwess me". We say "no, bless YOU", she laughs coily and says "nooo!" It's amazing she's smart enough to know her pronouns already.

"CUP-Y, HEAD-Y, HAT-Y, KISS-Y, BALL-Y, etc"= Julia's new way of saying everything. Where does she get this? None of us talk this way or ever have. She's becoming a real girly-girl overnight. She also prances on her toes around the house, especially when she's excited.

"ANNMEE"= Julia's beloved "other Mommy", her preferred source of comfort. If she ever runs away from home, I'll know where to find her :) It's hilarious to watch Allison and Julia jockey for position in her arms whenever they're with her. They stand by the door and anxiously wait her arrival and mom better get out of the way when Annmee's around. Thanks Claire for sharing your mommy with your friends- your a real trooper :)

"A-GO"= Here you go. She'll say it a few times, but then you better answer because whatever she's dangling is about to be dropped- look out below.

"NANK NOO"= thank you- She has such a sweet heart and thanks everyone for anything given to her. We hear it so much and still smile every time. You can help but smile :)

She has actually had an explosion of speech this past week and is now using 2, 3, & 4 word sentences. She is also repeating everything she hears which Carter loves. It's like having your own circus monkey, but at least she's learning in the process. I'm thrilled she's saying more. She talked and signed early and then kind of stopped with what she had. i of course blamed myself for not talking and reading to her enough, but apparently she has been listening all these months- just didn't feel like talking.

We love you Ju-Ju and are excited to hear all you have to say- happy and mad.

I just hope you can get a word in edgewise with your brother around :)